Happy New Year, 2006

Well, here it is – another new year. Hope it’s better than last year. This said despite that 2005 was actually one of the best years we’d ever had. And really, in all reality, 2005 was a fantastic year and quite frankly it really doesn’t get much better than it does for us.

Or does it?

I’ve personally made a few resolutions. One of them is to lose weight (how cliche) and the other was to get even more healthy than I am (another sad cliche). And to start my new year I slept til 10 AM and drank bottled water. So I’m off to a good start. Untill 10:30 when I lit a cigarette and forgot that today was January 1st. So much for my promising start.

But more than just my passive resolutions I was wondering if George Bush is sitting around today with a New Year’s resolution going ’round his head. I wonder if there are times where he’ll walk around thinking to himself, “Gee, I really need to break up this war.” I wonder if Georgie-boy is sitting on the toilet and the thought occures to him, “Shit, we really need to re-think our options here.” And on that note, I also wondered if people who sniff glue have a harder time getting boogers out of their nose.

I wonder if most of America is sitting around today thinking to themselves about the war or about the dead and the dying. Do they wonder if the soldiers are ever coming home and since this is New Year’s Day it would be a good time to have hope of this year being the final year for this war.

Many will be sitting around today and think about how bad this world is and wondering what we can do about it. But, on the other hand, many are sitting around today with nothing more on their mind than what to have for dinner tonight.

And it’s quite possible many are trying out new experiments like clipping their toenails and fingernails at the same time to see which will grow faster.

Some people are even sitting around believing that because it is a new year it’s a good time to start up a diet plan where they calculate and write down every thing they consume – but we all know that a vast majority of them will have forgotten this by February.

I was worried last night that the Taliban was looking at Times Square again as a great place to kill millions. They know how ritualistic we are and the attendance rate for such an occasion would be a definate do-able. So why not? But as I read todays news on the internet I note that no terrorist attacks happened so I’m now getting to wonder if they learned their lesson. It could be possible.

I wonder if Barry Gibb is sitting around today in his Miami mansion thinking about his future options – like what to do about the Bee Gees career. Or if Madonna is thinking about her New Year ahead and maybe she should dress her age more often – well, I would if I was hitting 80 years old wearing hotpants.

Do people like Osama bin Laden make resolutions all the same? Do you think that Osama-mama ever think to himself, “Oops! That wasn’t such a bright idea after all.” Or, “Boy, talk about having a regret.” Or do you think it’s remotely possible that Saddam is sitting around believing that if he could turn back time … I know I’ve looked back at a few decisions I’ve made in the past that are bad ones but at least I’ve learned from them. So I just wonder if anyone else is doing the same.

Most people today are thinking about the typical resolutions:

  • Quit Smoking
  • Lose Weight
  • Make More Money
  • Eat Right
  • Be a Better Person
  • Quit Biting Their Fingernails

But there are others right now thinking that this world is amess and I just hope it’s the peope that matters – like George, Osama, Suddam, Gary Glitter and my stupid neighbor who keeps thowing his leaves over our fence. These are the people that need to try and figure out how to make a difference in the world. But to the person who is wondering what to make for dinner tonight, we’re having baked chicken with rice and broccoli. Hopefully that helps you.